Funny English joke to help you learn English

Dear Boss,

People who do lots of work... make lots of mistakes  

People who do less work... make less mistakes

People who do no work... make no mistakes  

People who make no mistakes... gets promoted

That's why I spend most of my time sending e-mails & playing games at work

 I need a promotion.

The power of love

 

Wife : You keep my photo in the wallet all the time? 

Husband : Sure honey. When I have problems, I will look at your photo and the problems always seem to be gone.  

Wife : See? I am your miracle right? 

Husband : Of course.  when I look at you I realize that what in the world could cause me more trouble!!

Newborn

 

Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says:

 

"Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?"

 

Slim says, "I feel just like a newborn baby."

 

"Really !? Like a newborn baby !?"

 

"Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants

sources from: http://www.kinglishschool.com/fun.htm