Dear ยายธี : I had a much more confused minds (cittas and cetasikas) rising and falling in me when I was writing that. It was a journey through cetasikas and resultant emotions (hormonal changes?) After a while of argueing internally, emerged a resolution - in one word is "free" - in another word "flee" (from conflicts)! So, the poem ends with a dual edge - (actually 'a blur') ;-)